Lessons should be shared.
Often times we are taught a lesson by life and we rejoice that we have grown wiser and stronger, but become embarrassed that we experienced hardship or failed. We allow our embarrassment or shame to hinder us from sharing our testimony with others so they don’t feel alone and they are encouraged to keep going. I know I have not lived a long life or am an expert at life, but when I am filled with wisdom and gratitude I think its best to share. So I thought I would share a morsel of lesson with you today.
I have always taken things personally, internalized it, and somehow learned to make it my fault. I know I know, how torturous! Therefore I always sought validation, love, kindness, justification from others to make me happy and feel loved. I was seeking my identity through other people, and boy, did I experience a lot of disappointment, sadness, and depression. When friends were mean or distant I thought I did somethings wrong, when my boyfriend didn’t reciprocate love I thought I wasn’t giving enough love, when I had a bad day I thought God was punishing me for not being the perfect Christian. I still struggle with my faith walk now because of this behavior.
It wasn’t until I intentionally began to learn about myself, what I liked and disliked, what I deserved and wouldn’t endure that I realized I can’t seek my identity through others, but must find it in myself with guidance from God. When friends were mad or distant I learned it often has nothing to do with me. I can’t take anything personally. I learned that you can’t force someone to reciprocate love, but you must learn how to love in healthy dosages, for you and for others. And sometimes, the love you’re receiving isn’t healthy or nurturing to the person you are at that moment. Most importantly, I learned that God loves me regardless of how many times I fail or fall short, so I am loved no matter the circumstance.
I had to learn how to not take things personally. Honestly, don’t take anything personally. We are all living a life based on our perceptions and behaviors, so no one life is experienced the same way. Therefore always look to yourself for love, kindness, validation, so you are and know what you deserve and desire from others. Never stop learning and always share what you have learned, you never know who needs your testimony to pass life’s test.